Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
Chuck Norris is why we don't need no stinking badgers.
When you break a leg it is actually not your leg that is broken. It´s Chuck Norris´s leg. He owns everything including you and your pityful leg.
When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror nothing appears. There can never be a second Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
2PAC once thought he was tougher than Chuck Norris... he was later murdered.
The reason we are human is because Chuck roundhouse kicked a monkey into a higher species.