When Chuck Norris was born, the only person crying was the doctor. 
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The Swiss army uses a Chuck Norris knife.
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The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris.
The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction.
No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
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Chuck Norris was once part of a knock knock joke.
The Joke ended abruptly when after the first knock the door blew up killing the man behind it.
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Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
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Chuck Norris and Mr. T walked into a bar.
The bar was instantly destroyed, as that level of awesome cannot be contained in one building.
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Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
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Chuck Norris doesn't vote.
He elects!
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Chuck Norris doesn't throw a baseball, it just leaves his hand cowering in fear.
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A meteor did not kill the dinosaurs, Chuck Norris just went on a hunting trip.
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