Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.
Chuck Norris flew boats in the Vietnam War.
When you insult Chuck Norris, the next thing you are going to see is a bunch of halos.
Chuck Norris is the reason why George Michael is never gonna dance again.
Chuck Norris tangled with Wolverine. He beat to him to a bloody pulp, then dared him to heal himself. Wolverine will not be in the next X-Men movie.
When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
Scissors are told not to run with Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris went to Easter island, he couldn't understand why other tourists kept asking him to pose for photos next to the stone monoliths.
As an infant, Chuck Norris' parents gave him a toy hammer. He gave the world Stonehenge.