Chuck Norris gave Black Ops a thumbs up and people at Microsoft a roundhouse kick in the face. Suck it Microsoft.
We'll want to preserve Chuck Norris for future generations, when he dies. We won't be needing cryogenics cos Chuck's already frozen.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
Chuck Norris does not masturbate, because there is no greater pleasure than being Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has a Roundhouse Kick button on his Facebook page, and when he deletes a friend they actually die.
Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
Chuck Norris can win a football game by spiking a tennis ball over a volleyball net.
If Chuck Norris ever opened a restaurant, the only thing on the menu would be knuckle sandwiches and eye of roundhouse steaks.
Chuck Norris wears white to a funeral, no one asks why.
Chuck Norris fills a 1-Liter Bottle With 2 liters of water.