Let me insert my plug into your socket and we can generate some electricity.
If a firefighters business can go up in smoke, and a plumbers business can go down the drain, can a hooker get layed off?
What did the two tampons say to eachother? Nothing , because they were both stuck up bitches.
They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what that pussy needs.
The main rule to obey, if you are in jail: never take a bow for a fallen soap from the wash basin. Try and you'll cry.
There were three women sitting at a bar, talking about how loose they were. One woman said that her husband could fit his arm in up to his elbow. The next woman said her man could fit his leg in up to his knee. The last woman just slid over the bar stool.
One day, an old guy gets on a bus. Several minutes later a punk kid with red, green, and orange hair gets on. The kid notices that the old man keeps staring at him. "What you staring at, old man? Ain't you ever done anything wild in your time?" "Yeah. I screwed a parrot once. I was wondering if you were my son?"
Q: Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A: A mosquito stops sucking when you slap it...
Just heard someone bragging about his one night stand. Whatever mate, I've got two night stands. Either side of my bed.
A woman, after giving birth to six babies, upon seeing her husband gets up off the hospital bed, walks over to him shouting "I told you not to go doggy style!"