The best dirty jokes

Your beauty is why God invented eyeballs, but your booty is why God invented my balls!
has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: beauty, dirty, flirt, god, sex
Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it.
has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: dirty, flirt, sex
I knew I was gonna get along with my mother's boyfriend just fine. Cause when we met, I said to him "Hi Mr. Bob, How are you doing?" He said: "Oh you don't have to Mr. Bob me, just call me motherfucker".
has 65.05 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever. Me: What's that hunny? Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk. Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
has 65.00 % from 194 votes. More jokes about: black humor, black people, dirty
A man walks into a sperm Bank. He approaches a man who has just walked out of a donating cubicle. He decides to start a conversation with him. He approaches the man and says "So then, do you come here often?" The man replies "Only when the internets off" and walks off.
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, geek, internet, men
I had to get an Xbox controller tattooed on my vagina. So my boyfriend would play with me for a change.
has 64.81 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: dirty, technology
"Honey," said this husband to his wife, "I invited a friend home for supper." "What? Are you crazy? The house is a mess, I haven't been shopping, all the dishes are dirty, and I don't feel like cooking a fancy meal!" "I know all that." "Then why did you invite a friend for supper?" "Because the poor fool's thinking about getting married."
has 64.81 % from 73 votes. More jokes about: dirty, husband, marriage, wife
One day a group of engineers got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. They picked one engineer to go and tell Him that they were done with Him. The engineer walked up to God and said, "God, we've decided that we no longer need you. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't you just go on and get lost." God listened patiently to the man and after the engineer was done talking, God said, "Very well! How about this? Let's have a man-making contest." The man replied, "Okay, great!" But God added, "Now we're going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam." The engineers said, "Sure, no problem." He bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt. God just looked at him and said, "No, no, no. Go get your own dirt!"
has 64.80 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god, science
Q: What's the difference between a lawyer and a prostitute? A: Clothes.
has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dirty, insulting, lawyer, mean, sex
A sexology professor announced that if any man over 50 eats 2 or 3 dates with a raw garlic clove he never fails in sex problems. This prescription makes his dick strong and heathy. There is only one side effect. That diet causes he blows many farts daily!
has 64.76 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: dating, dirty, disgusting, fart, sex
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