The best disgusting jokes

An old couple is on a walk, when a pigeon flies by and relieves himself on the woman's head. "Yech!" says the woman. "Get some toilet paper." "What for? He must be half-a-mile away by now."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, couple, disgusting, old people
A lady goes to the doctor, and says: "Doc, I have this smell about me that I can't get rid of no matter what I do. Can you help me?" The doctor says, "yeah I can help you but I'll have to examine you. You'll have to take all your clothes off first." So the lady takes her clothes off. Right away the doctor says, "hold on, I'll be right back." A couple minutes later he comes back with an 8-foot stick that has a little hook on the end of it. The lady says, "oh doctor, what str going to do with that?" And the doctor says, as he's going through the movements of opening a high window, "well I'm going to open the window, it smells like shit in here."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: communication, disgusting, doctor, insulting, women
A married couple go to a restaurant. A blonde waitress takes their order and returns several minutes later, carrying a plate with only a plain hamburger bun on it. The man asks, "Where's the burger?" The waitress lifts her arm and pulls out a burger from her armpit. "I was keeping it warm," she replies. The wife says, "Please cancel my hot dog order."
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: blonde, disgusting, dog, food, marriage
How many dead babies does it take to paint a wall red? Depends how hard you throw them.
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has 62.04 % from 218 votes. More jokes about: dead baby, disgusting
1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, women
Q: Why did the bald man cut holes in his pockets? A: He wanted to run his fingers through his hair.
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Two sperms. The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?" The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, time
Q: What's the difference between erotic and kinky? A: Erotic is when you use a feather; kinky is when you use the whole chicken.
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has 61.35 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What's the best thing about a Siamese twin baby? Threesomes.
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence. So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts screwing the goat. He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, "Hey, you want a piece of this?" The Aggie says, ´"Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?"
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has 61.28 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
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