The best disgusting jokes

Q: How do you know that a dead body found by the side of the road is a nurse? A: Because its stomach is empty, its bladder is full, and its ass chewed!
Vote: has 52.93 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, disgusting, nurse
Once upon a time there were these two bums walking down the railroad tracks, and the first bum, Fred, thought he smelled a nasty old smell. He asked his companion, Jeff, ''Did you s**t your pants?'' "Hell no," Jeff said. They walked a few more miles and the smell got worse. "Did you s**t your pants, Jeff?" "I swear to the God almighty I did not s**t my pants," Jeff said. So they walk three more miles and the smell gets just horrible. Fred runs over and pulls down Jeff's pants and says, "I thought you said you didn't s**t your pants?!" "I didn't." Jeff said. "They're your pants."
Vote: has 52.49 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
I got home to see my two months pregnant wife crouched in the bathroom crying. Her red, smudged eyes looked at me as she told me she'd lost the baby. I told the silly thing not to be so upset, I could clearly see it in the toilet.
Vote: has 52.49 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: baby, disgusting, wife
How does herpes leave the hospital? On crotches.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
Q: Why did the referee stop the leper hockey game? A: There was a face-off in the corner.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
What do you call a trash bag full of mutilated laboratory monkeys? Rhesus Pieces.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, disgusting
How can you tell if a porno was made in the 70's? The guys' schlongs have sideburns!
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, time
Two hunters are stalking through the forest when one says to the other that he has to take a dump. "Well, go in the bushes." "What should I use to wipe my ass?" "Use a dollar bill." A few minutes later the hunter steps out of the bushes with s**t all over his hands. "What happened?" asks his friend. "I didn't have a dollar bill, so I used four quarters."
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, hunting, money
Q: How do you recycle a condom? A: Turn it inside out and shake the f**k out of it.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting
Cannibal Son: Mom, I don't like my brother anymore. Cannibal Mother: You shut up and eat!
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More jokes about: disgusting, family, food