The best disgusting jokes

An old woman goes to the doctor's office. The doctor gives her a checkup and says, "I need to do stool, blood and urine tests." The woman says, "Well can I just leave my underwear? Bingo starts in half an hour."
Vote:
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, old people
How is parsley like pubic hair? You push it aside to eat, and sometimes it gets stuck between your teeth after meals.
Vote:
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Q: What's meaner than a pit bull with herpes? A: The guy who gave it to him.
Vote:
has 52.18 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: animal, disgusting, health
Silence is golden. Unless you have an infant. Then its probably blue.
Vote:
has 52.04 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
What is funnier than a zombie baby hanging from a ceiling fan? Hitting it with a shovel when it comes around.
Vote:
has 51.70 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: baby, disgusting
Q: What can popsicles do that men can't? A: Come in five flavors.
Vote:
has 51.67 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Two guys narrowly escaped from a sinking ship on a life raft and discovered a magic lamp tucked away in a dark cranny. Figuring what the hell, one of the men gave the lamp a rub and "poof," a cloud of smoke. A second later, a genie appeared and said, "I will grant each of you one wish." After thinking a while, the first man turned to the genie and said, "I wish I were floating on an ocean of beer." The genie granted the man's wish and disappeared. The man's companion turned to him and said, "Way to go idiot. Now we have to pee in the boat."
Vote:
has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: beer, disgusting, genie, life
Yo mama so damn short, she uses salt shaker as a toilet.
Vote:
has 51.61 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, stupid, Yo mama
Q: Why do men take showers instead of baths? A: Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
Vote:
has 51.34 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: disgusting
Two missionaries in Africa were apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, built a huge fire under it, and left them there. A few minutes later, one of the missionaries started to laugh uncontrollably. The other missionary couldn't believe it! He said, "What's wrong with you? We're being boiled alive! They're gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?" The other missionary replied, "I just peed in the soup!"
Vote:
has 51.13 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, food
<<<28293031
More jokes →
Page 28 of 49.