Q: What is worse than ten dead people in one trashcan? A: One dead person in ten trashcans!
Bob: "Hey, Sue, why is there a tampon hanging out of your mouth?" Sue: "Oh my God. What did I do with my cigarette?"
How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends how hard you throw them.
Did you hear about the midget that went into the whorehouse? He got a twat in the face.
Q: Why did the cowboy have sh*t in his mustache? A: Cuz he'd been lookin for love in all the wrong places.
What did Obi Wan say when Luke was constipated? "Use the F-O-R-C-E Luke!"
Q: Why do men take showers instead of baths? A: Pissing in the bath is disgusting.
One day two boys were walking through the woods when they saw some rabbit turds. One of the boys said, "What is that?" "They're smart pills," said the other boy. "Eat them and they'll make you smarter." So he ate them and said, "These taste like crap." "See," said the other boy, "you're getting smarter already."
Q: How do you know you're in a vampire bar? A: There's a string hanging out of your Bloody Mary.
Q: What do you call a man with no arms or legs, with a ten inch penis? A: "Partially disabled."