The best gay jokes

A guy walks into a bar with an alligator. It's about 10 feet long. The bartender flips out and says, "Hey buddy, you gotta get that son of a b*tch outta here. It's going to bite one of my customers and I'm going to get sued." The guy says, "No no no, it's a tame alligator. I'll prove it to you." He picks up the alligator and puts it on the bar. Then he unzips his pants, pulls out his package and sticks it in the alligator's mouth. The alligator just keeps his mouth open. After about 5 minutes, he pulls it out of the alligator's mouth and zips up his pants and says, "See, I told you it was a tame alligator. Anybody else want to try it?" The drunk down at the end of the bar says, "Yah, I'd like to try it but I don't think I can hold my mouth open that long!"
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has 68.73 % from 155 votes. More jokes about: animal, bar, dirty, gay
So, a gay man goes to church one Sunday. As the offering basket is passed, he drops in a big wad of bills. When the basket gets back to the minister, he notices the wad of money and announces: "Someone here was very generous in the offering today. I would like to ask the person who gave this large amount of money to please stand." The gay man stood up. The minister continued, "Well, sir, we certainly do appreciate your generosity. And to show our appreciation, I'm going to let you select your three favorite hymns." "Okay," the gay man replied, "I'll take him, him and him!"
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has 68.55 % from 203 votes. More jokes about: gay
Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur? A: Megasoreass.
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has 68.46 % from 598 votes. More jokes about: animal, gay
I think my sons gay...I took off the seat of his bike, and he didn't notice.
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has 68.35 % from 260 votes. More jokes about: gay, kids
Three boys are walking home from school and they see a naked woman. One of them runs away the other two stay to watch. The next day they are walking home from school and they see the naked woman again, and again the same boy runs away. Another day later they are walking home and they see the naked woman again, as the boy tries to run away the other boys grab him and ask, "What are you gay or something don't you like looking at naked women?" He replied, "Yeah, I love looking at naked women but my mom said that if I see one I'll turn into stone and I feel something starting to get hard."
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has 68.14 % from 145 votes. More jokes about: gay, kids, school, women
Three gay men died, and were going to be cremated. Their lovers happened to be at the funeral home at the same time, and were discussing what they planned to do with the ashes. The first man said, "My Ryan loved to fly, so I'm going up in a plane and scatter his ashes in the sky." The second man said, "My Ross was a good fisherman, so I'm going to scatter his ashes in our favorite lake." The third man said, "My Jack was such a good lover, I think I'm going to dump his ashes in a pot of chili, so he can tear my ass up just one more time."
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has 68.10 % from 176 votes. More jokes about: airplane, black humor, death, funeral, gay
Son: Dad, what does 'gay' means? Father: It means 'to be happy'. Son: Are you gay? Father: No, son. I have a wife.
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has 67.80 % from 215 votes. More jokes about: gay, wife
Q: Why are gays so happy? A: Becuase the luck does not have the courage turning back to them.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: dirty, gay, life
A guy came into a bar one day and said to the barman "Give me six double vodkas." The barman says "Wow! you must have had one hell of a day." "Yes, I've just found out my older brother is gay." The next day the same guy came into the bar and placed the same order for drinks. When the bartender asked what the problem was today the answer came back, "I've just found out that my younger brother is gay too!" On the third day the guy came into the bar and ordered another six double vodkas. The bartender said "Darn! Doesn't anybody in your family like women?" "Yeah, my wife..."
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has 66.49 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, gay, wife
Q: What did one gay sperm say to the other gay sperm? A: "How are we supposed to find an egg in all this sh*t?"
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has 66.46 % from 70 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, gay
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