A man called, furious about an Orlando, Florida, vacation package we had booked for him: He was expecting an ocean-view hotel room. I explained that was not possible since Orlando is in the middle of the state. "Don't lie to me," he said. "I looked on the map, and Florida is a very thin state."
Yo mama so fat when she was swimming in the ocean the indians claimed her as the new land.
Q: Why can't women read maps? A: Because only the male mind can comprehend the concept of 1 inch equals a mile.
China lets Chuck Norris search for porn on Google.
In 2011 someone asked Chuck Norris if he had ever been to Portugal. He answered: "Where?" The country went bankrupt.
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
How to speak Irish: Whale Oil Beef Hooked Say them all quickly.
Q: What do blondes and railroad tracks have in common? A: They've both been laid all over America.
Q: Why is Santa always so jolly when he comes to the UK? A: He can claim Gift Relief.
A mother noticed her little dauther praying. "Please, God," the little girl kept saying. "Bless my father and my mother and make Melaka the capital city of Malaysia." "Why did you make such as strange request?" the mother asked. "Beacause that's what I wrote in my Geography test this morning!"