Facebook: "My kids are perfect." Instagram: "My kids are beautiful." Twitter: "My kids are why I drink."
I am often asked, "Is google a man or a women?" My simple answer is: It's a woman because it won't let you finish your sentence without making a suggestion.
Q: What's O. J. Simpson's Internet address? A: Slash, slash, backslash, slash, slash, escape.
Yo mama's so fat, that her MySpace has no space.
Q: What does an SEO and part-time chiropractor work on? A: Your bad backlinks.
I follow CIA on Twitter just so they can see how it feels.
When Chuck Norris plays hide and seek, even google can't find him.
A press release: "Yesterday, for the first time a hacker was convicted of network penetration and went to jail to serve a 12 years sentence. According to the data of the central computer of the police, the hacker goes to liberty the day after tomorrow because of expiration of the sentence."
"I spent the whole evening knotsurfing!" "Don't you mean netsurfing?" "No, everyone was complaining because I tied the computer up for ages!"
Before Instagram, I used to waste so much time sitting around having to imagine what my friends' food looked like.