What was Forrest Gump's email password? 1forrest1
What does a network administrator say when he gets back to home from work ? There’s no place like 127.0.0.1!
I keep hitting “escape”, but I’m still here.
Why did the computer get cold? Because it forgot to close windows.
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, they just declare darkness the standard!
1998: Don't get in the car with strangers. 2008: Don't meet people from the internet. 2018: Order yourself a stranger to get in the car with from the internet. (Uber)
A rather obese man is very excited about his new job and wants to start work immediately. However, when he sits down at his computer, the only program installed was spreadsheets. Confused, the man calls over his boss and asks:"Why there is only excel installed on this computer?" His boss replies, "It was the only program in your size!"
Programmers: See one warning, fixes warning. Compiles... See two errors, fixes errors. Compiles... See 83 errors, pitches computer.
Caller: Hey, can you help me? My computer has locked up, and no matter how many times I type eleven, it won’t unfreeze. Agent: What do you mean, “type eleven?” Caller: The message on my screen says, “Error Type 11!”