The best IT jokes

How do you keep a programmer in the shower all day? Give him a bottle of shampoo which says "lather, rinse, repeat."
has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: IT
Me: Siri, why am I alone? Siri: *opens front facing camera*
has 71.81 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: IT, phone
Linux is like wigwam: no Gates, no Windows and Apache inside.
has 71.80 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: IT, programmer
A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
has 71.59 % from 132 votes. More jokes about: bar, IT, programmer
A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. "No thanks, I'm traveling light."
has 71.15 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: IT
Our staff has completed the 3 years of work on time and under budget. We have gone through every line of code in every program in every system. We have analyzed all databases, all data files, including backups and historic archives, and modified all data to reflect the change. We are proud to report that we have completed the "Y-to-K" date change mission, and have now implemented all changes to all programs and all data to reflect the following new standards: Januark, Februark, March, April, Mak, June, Julk, August, September, October, November, December and... Sundak, Mondak, Tuesdak, Wednesdak, Thursdak, Fridak, Saturdak I trust that this is satisfactory, because to be honest, none of this Y-to-K problem has made any sense to me. But I understand it is a global problem, and our team is glad to help in any way possible.And what does the year 2000 have to do with it? Speaking of which, what do you think we ought to do next year when the two digit year rolls over from 99 to 00? We await your direction.
has 70.84 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: IT, management, money, time
Whoever stole my copy of Microsoft Office. I will find you. You have my Word.
has 70.83 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: IT
Before Instagram, I used to waste so much time sitting around having to imagine what my friends' food looked like.
has 70.83 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: food, friendship, internet, IT, technology
Q: How many Microsoft engineers does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: None, they just declare darkness the standard!
has 70.76 % from 93 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT, light bulb, technology
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better". So I installed LINUX.
has 70.55 % from 44 votes. More jokes about: computer, geek, IT
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