HR manager to job candidate: ‘I see you’ve had no computer training. Although that qualifies you for upper management, it means you’re under-qualified for our entry level positions.’
Why is Apple offering a free case for all iPhone 6 buyers? It doesn't help with reception, but protects the iPhone when you throw it against the wall after dropping another call!
I have a statistics joke, but it's not significant. I have a regression joke, but it sounds quite mean. I have a machine learning joke, but it is not performing as well on a new audience. I have a joke about deep learning but I can't explain it. I have a geography joke, but I don't know where it is.
A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the salesman, “I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen.” The surprised salesman replies, “But, madam, computers do not have curtains.” And the blonde said, “Helloooo…. I’ve got Windows!”
How many Microsoft programmers does it take to start the November 5th bonfire? Zero Microsoft declares darkness to be a new standard.
The biggest SEO problem with trampoline websites is the high user bounce rate!
Do files get embarrassed when they’re unzipped?
Q: How many Microsoft executives does it take to change a light bulb? A: We can see no need for uninstallation and have therefore made no provision for light bulbs to be removed.
90% of programmer errors come from data from other programmers.
I dropped my laptop into the ocean the other day. Now I have a Dell rolling in the deep.