The best IT jokes

Computer users are divided into three types: novice, intermediate and expert. Novice users: people who are afraid that simply pressing a key might break their computer. Intermediate users: people who don’t know how to fix their computer after they’ve just pressed a key that broke it. Expert users: people who break other people’s computers.
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has 73.44 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: IT
A girl started noticing a guy who stands in front of her home everyday in the evening. She noticed the guy always comes mostly in the evenings and weekends. The guy never tried to talk to her nor showed any gesture, he just moves here and there by looking into his mobile phone and occasionally stealing a stare at her. It went on like that for a year and the girl understood the guy was in love with her but was too shy to express his feelings. So, she told her parents. They too saw him and liked him. They discussed with her grandparents about a likely marriage. But wanted her to make the first move. The next day, she went to him and said, Hi. I'm Jada. He said, Hi. I'm Smith. Hearing this, the girl was very happy as the names were matching like Will Smith and Jada Pinkett. The girl went on and said, I really appreciate your patience and decency. You have been standing in front of my home everyday for about a year now. So, I understand that you are in love with me but too shy to say it. I think i really like you too and would love it if we get married. The guy smiled and said, Forgive me sister! Actually your home's WIFI doesn't have a password. So, i come here every evening after work to use free wi-fi to chat with my girlfriend.
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has 73.33 % from 124 votes. More jokes about: IT, marriage, phone, religious, technology
A SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, "Can I join you?"
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has 73.12 % from 123 votes. More jokes about: bar, IT, programmer
A guy tells his friends: The girl I was dating broke my heart, so I broke her Apple iPhone 5. You all know who cried more
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has 72.92 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: dating, IT, phone, technology
I provide technical support for the computer software published by my company. One day, over the phone, I was helping a customer install a product on a Macintosh. The procedure required him to delete an old file. On the Mac, there is an icon of a trash can that is used to collect items to be permanently deleted. I told the customer to click on the old file and drag it to the trash. Then I had him perform a few other steps. As a reminder, I said, "Don't forget to empty the trash." Obediently he replied, "Yes, dear."
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has 72.04 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, customer service, IT, marriage, technology
Q: How many Object Oriented programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they send it a message, and it changes itself.
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has 71.97 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: IT, light bulb, programmer
Your mama so stupid she bought tickets to Xbox Live.
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has 71.85 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: IT, stupid, Yo mama
A new army computer is put through its paces. An officer types in a question, ‘How far is it from the barrack gate to the armoury?’ The computer replies, ‘Seven hundred.’ The officer types, ‘Seven hundred what?’ The computer replies, ‘Seven hundred, sir!’
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: IT
The box said "Requires Windows Vista or better". So I installed LINUX.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: computer, geek, IT
UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
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has 71.76 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, programmer