Q: How many Apple Iphone 6 early adopters does it take to change a light bulb? A: 3001. 1 to do the work and 3000 to go online and bitch about the lack of obscure features!
I never thought that the Internet was very useful, but now I've changed my mind. Let's hope your new one works better than the one you had before.
What kind of doctor fixes broken websites? A URLologist.
If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over! To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"! If you needed a break from life, click on suspend. Hit "any key" to continue life when ready. To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster. To add/remove someone in your life, click settings and control panel. To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings. If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers. When you loose your car keys, click on find. "Help" with the chores is just a click away. Auto insurance wouldn't be necessary. You would use your diskette to recover from a crash. And, we could click on "SEND NOW" and a Pizza would be on it's way to you.
Chuck Norris logged on MSN through the display of washing machines.
"Knock, knock.Who's there?" very long pause... "Java."
Why did the boy mouse like the girl mouse? They just seemed to click.
Q: What do you call a group of 8 hobbits A: Hobbyte.
Chuck Norris knows the value of NULL, and he can sort by it too.
I would actually use Siri if the voice sounded like Morgan Freeman.