The best IT jokes

Install the Blue Screen of Death screen-saver on someone's computer.
Vote: has 79.57 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: April fools, computer, IT
Two geeks are talking over lunch. The first guy says, "You wouldn't believe what happened this morning. A girl rode up to me on her bike, took off all her clothes, and said 'Take whatever you want!' … So I took the bike" The second guy says, "Good choice, her clothes probably wouldn't have fit you."
Vote: has 79.56 % from 101 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: geek, IT
A customer comes into the computer store. I'm looking for a mystery Adventure Game with lots of graphics. You know, something really challenging." "Well," replied the clerk, "Have you tried Vista?"
Vote: has 79.28 % from 128 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, customer service, game, IT
A psychiatrist had no patients in his office and he was bored. Suddenly , the door opened slowly and a man crept into the room on four legs. His mouth was full with pieces of colored plastic. He was holding strange objects in his hands. He was dragging cables along behind himself. The doctor was glad because of the visit and exclaimed, "And what do we have here, a little snake? Come to Uncle Doctor, my snake..." The man shook his head. "Oh, sorry, I didn't notice your legs. You're a dragon, right?" The man shook his head again angrily. "Sorry... a worm?" The visitor spitted out the plastic pieces. "Go to hell, you idiot! I'm the system administrator and I came to change your LAN cable!"
Vote: has 79.19 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, computer, doctor, IT, programmer
Satan greets him: "Welcome Mr. Gates, we've been waiting for you. This will be your home for all eternity. You've been selfish, greedy and a big liar all your life. Now, since you've got me in a good mood, I'll be generous and give you a choice of three places in which you'll be locked up forever. Satan takes Bill to a huge lake of fire in which millions of poor souls are tormented and tortured. He then takes him to a massive coliseum where thousands of people are chased about and devoured by starving lions. Finally, he takes Bill to a tiny room in which there is a bottle of the finest wine sitting on a table. To Bill's delight, he sees a PC in the corner. Without hesitation, Bill says "I'll take this option." "Fine," says Satan, allowing Bill to enter the room. Satan locks the room after Bill. As he turns around, he bumps into Lucifer. "That was Bill Gates!" cried Lucifer. "Why did you give him the best place of all!" "That's what everyone thinks" snickered Satan. "The bottle has a hole in it!" "What about the PC?" "It's got Windows 95!" laughed Satan. "And it's missing three keys," "Which three?" "Control, Alt and Delete."
Vote: has 78.89 % from 92 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, life, vulgar
There are 2 types of people in the world. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data
Vote: has 78.50 % from 79 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
Home is where the wifi connects automatically.
Vote: has 77.70 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT
Two programmers after work, talking in a pub: "You will never believe me when I tell you what happened to me yesterday. I met a very nice blonde in a bar." - And what did you do ? "I invited her to my place, we had some drinks and then the girl asked me to undress her." "Are you kidding me ? And what did you do then?" "I got her blouse and her dress off and then i got her to sit on my office, right next to my new laptop." "Oh, you got a new laptop. What model and what are its specifications?"
Vote: has 77.32 % from 157 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: bar, IT, office, programmer, women
How can you tell which one of your friends has the new iPhone 6 plus? Don't worry, they'll let you know.
Vote: has 77.23 % from 69 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, phone, technology
What's an extroverted IT professional? One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
Vote: has 76.99 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, programmer