The best IT jokes

An artist, a lawyer, and a programmer are discussing the merits of a mistress. The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce and bankruptcy. The programmer says, ‘It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. My wife thinks I’m with my mistress. My mistress thinks I’m home with my wife, and I can spend all night on the computer!’
Vote: has 76.80 % from 29 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT
What's an extroverted IT professional? One who looks at your shoes while he's talking to you, instead of his own.
Vote: has 76.68 % from 93 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT, programmer
A Computer Engineer was asked by his five-year-old son: "Dad, what is Windows 95?" "Well, it’s 32-bit extensions and a graphical shell for a 16-bit patch to an 8-bit operating system originally coded for a 4-bit microprocessor, written by a 2-bit company that can't stand 1 bit of competition."
Vote: has 76.61 % from 224 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: age, computer, dad, IT, programmer
On Unix, I always hide all of my personal files in the /bin/laden directory.
Vote: has 76.32 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, programmer, technology
The biggest SEO problem with trampoline websites is the high user bounce rate!
Vote: has 76.06 % from 28 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: computer, geek, internet, IT, technology
3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
Vote: has 75.95 % from 60 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bar, coding, geek, IT, nerd
There are 2 types of people in the world. Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data
Vote: has 75.94 % from 90 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: IT
Two computers in the same LAN chatting one night: PC1: I was having a nightmare last night, it was so horrible. PC2: Why, what did you dream about ? PC1: I was sleeping, dreaming 0 1 1 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 when all of a sudden a 2 popped up!
Vote: has 75.59 % from 122 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: computer, IT
A group of computer science geeks were listening to a lecture about Java programming at a university. After the lecture, one of the men leaned over and grabbed a woman’s breast. Woman: Hey! That’s private OK ? The man hesitated for a second looking confused. Man: But I thought we were in the same class.
Vote: has 75.30 % from 139 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: geek, IT, programmer
Two programmers after work, talking in a pub: "You will never believe me when I tell you what happened to me yesterday. I met a very nice blonde in a bar." - And what did you do ? "I invited her to my place, we had some drinks and then the girl asked me to undress her." "Are you kidding me ? And what did you do then?" "I got her blouse and her dress off and then i got her to sit on my office, right next to my new laptop." "Oh, you got a new laptop. What model and what are its specifications?"
Vote: has 75.28 % from 180 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bar, IT, office, programmer, women


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