The best IT jokes

Warning! User Error. Kindly replace user and press a key to continue.
has 76.80 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: geek, IT, technology
I had a programming problem and decided to use regular expressions to solve it. Now I have two problems.
has 76.51 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: coding, IT, programmer
Two computers in the same LAN chatting one night: PC1: I was having a nightmare last night, it was so horrible. PC2: Why, what did you dream about ? PC1: I was sleeping, dreaming 0 1 1 0 1 0 0 0 1 0 when all of a sudden a 2 popped up!
has 76.24 % from 140 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT
3 Database SQL walked into a NoSQL bar. A little while later they walked out because they couldn't find a table.
has 75.73 % from 94 votes. More jokes about: bar, coding, geek, IT, nerd
Two programmers after work, talking in a pub: "You will never believe me when I tell you what happened to me yesterday. I met a very nice blonde in a bar." - And what did you do ? "I invited her to my place, we had some drinks and then the girl asked me to undress her." "Are you kidding me ? And what did you do then?" "I got her blouse and her dress off and then i got her to sit on my office, right next to my new laptop." "Oh, you got a new laptop. What model and what are its specifications?"
has 75.68 % from 206 votes. More jokes about: bar, IT, office, programmer, women
You know, I have Google+, Facebook, Twitter, Skype accounts... Man, and do you have life? OMG, No! Could you send me a link?
has 75.49 % from 365 votes. More jokes about: Facebook, IT, life, technology
Q: Why did the programmer quit his job? A: Because he didn't get arrays.
has 75.27 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: IT, money, programmer, work
Q: How many Object Oriented programmers does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they send it a message, and it changes itself.
has 75.17 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: IT, light bulb, programmer
My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.
has 74.78 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: coding, geek, IT
An artist, a lawyer, and a programmer are discussing the merits of a mistress. The artist tells of the passion, the thrill which comes with the risk of being discovered. The lawyer warns of the difficulties. It can lead to guilt, divorce and bankruptcy. The programmer says, ‘It’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me. My wife thinks I’m with my mistress. My mistress thinks I’m home with my wife, and I can spend all night on the computer!’
has 74.72 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: IT
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