Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear.
The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
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When Chuck Norris logged in to WoW, everyone logged out.
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The climate requires Chuck's permission to change.
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Chuck Norris discovered a new theory of relativity involving multiple universes in which Chuck Norris is even more badass than in this one.
When it was discovered by Albert Einstein and made public, Chuck Norris roundhouse-kicked him in the face.
We know Albert Einstein today as Stephen Hawking.
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If Chuck Norris were an Adam's Apple, he'd be in your throat right now.
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Researchers once tried to measure Chuck Norris' IQ, but found that numbers don't count that high.
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Originally Chuck Norris was in the cast of "The Expendables" but the movie was only 3 seconds long because there was nothing left to kill.
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Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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Unicorns are extinct but Chuck Norris used all their horns as toothpicks.
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When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesn’t get charged.
He holds up the phone and money falls out.
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