Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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When Chuck Norris was kidnapped by aliens he did experiments on them.
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When Chuck Norris got his first sling-shot, he created what we now know today as the "Moon", "Mars", "Jupitar", "Saturn" and "Pluto"
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Chuck Norris can gargle with honey.
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911 calls Chuck Norris for emergency.
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Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
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Gravity obeys Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is the only weapon allowed through airport security
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There was a school about learning roundhouse kicks.
No one finished it.
Why?
Chuck Norris kicked them with a roundhouse kick.
It's his only weakness so no one must know how to do Roundhouse Kick!
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When Chuck Norris goes to the DMV, they take a number.
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Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.
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