I got a tattoo of Chuck Norris on my own leg... now it won't stop roundhouse kicking me in the face.
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Chuck Norris is reading all these jokes and thinking to himself: They make me sound like a pussy.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear a wristwatch.
He always knows when it's time to kick some ass.
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Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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Guns sleep with a picture of Chuck Norris under their pillows.
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Fear of spiders is aracnaphobia, fear of tight spaces is chlaustraphobia, fear of Chuck Norris is called Logic
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Chuck Norris always knows where x is.
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Host migration is Chuck Norris pausing multiplayer.
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Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life.
When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
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Fire trucks and ambulances pull to the shoulder when chuck Norris drives by.
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Chuck Norris' pulse-rate is measured on the Richter Scale.
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