I got a tattoo of Chuck Norris on my own leg... now it won't stop roundhouse kicking me in the face.
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Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles is based on a true story: Chuck Norris once swallowed a turtle whole, and when he crapped it out, the turtle was six feet tall and had learned karate.
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When you break a leg it is actually not your leg that is broken.
It´s Chuck Norris´s leg.
He owns everything including you and your pityful leg.
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Chuck Norris doesn't sweat.
He forces the air around him to cry and uses it's tears to cool himself.
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Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
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If Chuck Norris told you to jump off a bridge, would you?
Of course you would.
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Even Google can't find Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can obtain unobtainable.
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Chuck Norris had six kids, they were called SEAL TEAM 6.
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Ed and Lorraine Warren have the doll Anabelle locked in a glass case in their basement, a priest comes there every week to whisper Chuck Norris's name in its ear.
The doll locked itself in the case upon first hearing the name.
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Chuck Norris can win a game of chess by saying "Yahtzee!"
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