If Chuck were in the movie Nightmare On Elm Street then it would be renamed nightmare on Chuck Norris Street, cuz nobody dared to get near him.
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Chuck Norris once gave a man an apple.
Today that man is known as Steve Jobs.
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There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off.
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Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
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Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
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Chuck Norris' shadow stays ten steps behind him in fear of a roundhouse kick.
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Chuck Norris can kill a man in 52 different ways using only a ballpoint pen.
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Chuck Norris uses black holes to clean his dishes.
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How much white out does Chuck Norris use?
Don't be silly - Chuck Norris never makes mistakes.
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Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
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