Chuck Norris douses all his food in diesel fuel and sets it on fire, 'cuz he likes it mildly spicy.
Chuck Norris once decided to dig a hole, today we call it the Grand Canyon.
The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
Before America can declare war, congress has to ask Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
Chuck Norris' snot rocket was used to take men to the moon.
Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
Chuck Norris knows Victoria's secret.
Chuck Norris can lift up a chair with one hand... While he's sitting on it...
Chuck Norris knows who let the dogs out.
Chuck Norris once went to court for a crime, the judge pleaded guilty.