Chuck Norris doesn't tie shoelaces, he wins them.
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All men are created equal.
Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris was supposed to make a cameo appearence in "Full House" but he was let off because he wanted to rename the show "Roundhouse."
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When Clark Kent goes into a phonebooth, Superman comes out.
When Chuck Norris goes into a phone booth, it explodes and Chuck walks away.
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Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
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Chuck Norris got into Cambridge... without any qualifications.
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Chuck Norris only mast*rbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris haunts ghosts.
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The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch.
He simply decides what time it is.
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Chuck Norris never actually roundhouse kicks anyone, the world just spins underneath him when he lifts his legs.
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