Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes.
He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
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Freds voice is high because Chuck Norris kicked him in the nuts.
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Chuck Norris can fold airplanes into paper.
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Scientists have developed a way to travel through time, by being on the recieving end of a roundhouse kick by Chuck Norris.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
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Chuck Norris doesn't cry.
His eyes sweat.
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Justin Bieber has Chuck Norris fever!
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The entire movie of "Anaconda" was recorded inside Chuck Norris' pants.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys.
The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore.
The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out."
The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth."
Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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Moses did not part the sea.
Chuck Norris accidently did while sneezing.
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