Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as he who shall not be named.
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Beetlejuice is afraid to say Chuck Norris 3 times.
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Chuck Norris's programs can pass the Turing Test by staring at the interrogator.
Sticks and stones may break your bones but Chuck Norris' fists will kill you.
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People say that time heals all wounds.
They obviously never got roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris
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Chuck Norris can shoot around a corner.
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Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
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A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
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