Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books, the words assemble themselves out of fear.
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The Expendables 2 is actually a documentary film showing Chuck Norris killing people.
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Elvis Presley, Richard Petty, Budweiser, and Michael Jackson all call Chuck Norris "The King".
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What occurs twice in The Beginning, never in The End, but is at The End of Everything?
Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can drive a solar-powered car at night.
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Chuck Norris got his drivers license at the age of 16 Seconds.
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Chuck Norris once stuck a fork in a toaster and the toaster got electrocuted.
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Chuck Norris can arrive anywhere without actually leaving.
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris likes steel wool... it's his loofah.
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