When Chuck Norris talks, people listen. When he doesn't, people still listen.
The cops pulled Chuck Norris over for going 55 miles per hour on the freeway. But since he wasn't in a car, they had to give him a ticket for jaywalking.
My friend to me "I don't understand why Chuck Norris is the butt of so many jokes." Me to the friend "Well he does kick a lot of them."
Chuck Norris can simply walk into Mordor.
Never look a gift Chuck Norris in the mouth, because he will bite your damn eyes off.
UV rays are caused by Chuck Norris' smiles.
If Chuck Norris gets a question wrong, it is right.
Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom. Because he never f*cks up.
Chuck Norris' feet are so fast, he can kick you in the past.
Although it is not common knowledge, there are actually three sides to the Force: the light side, the dark side, and Chuck Norris.