Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
Chuck Norris can play Pokemon Go on his landline.
Chuck Norris can turn carbon paper into diamonds.
Chuck Norris steps into the confession booth. The Priests confess his sins.
Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear... Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear
Chuck Norris can stand the rain...
When Chuck Norris' dreams come true, your worst nightmares begin.
Chuck Norris puts ice cube trays in the cupboard, and he gets ice.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.