Chuck Norris makes his own Girl Scout cookies using real Girl Scouts.
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The Grinch didn't really steal Christmas.
He just hired Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris plays hangman, he decides what the word is.
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Chuck Norris eats gummy bears and shits out grizzly bears.
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Once upon a time, Chuck Norris moved a Mack truck out of his way.
We now know this truck as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris doesn't use his hand to catch bullets, he uses his mind.
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Chuck Norris takes care of his guardian angel.
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The supreme court issued a ban not allowing Chuck Norris to flex his muscles, for fear of public safety.
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Chuck Norris isn't a cat person but if he was, he would own 3 lions, a snow leopard, and cougar.
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Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
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Chuck Norris doesn't break bricks.
They fold under pressure.
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