When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.
Scientists don't bother to calculate how many years old the planet earth is, they just say it's one Chuck old.
Chuck Norris can get a strike in bowling using a ping-pong ball.
Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
Chuck Norris doesn't contribute to global warming, he exhales pure oxygen.
Chuck Norris once created a flamethrower by urinating into a lighter.
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
The moon is just a football Chuck Norris kicked up when he was a kid.
Chuck Norris uses battery acid for eye drops.
Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
Chuck Norris can toast bread in a freezer.