The tides don't change because of the moon; the sea just wants to be as far away as possible from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris was supposed to play the lead role in Mission: Impossible. He was replaced by Tom Cruise because the tittle wouldn't make any sense.
Revenge is a dish best served...by Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris wants popcorn, he breathes on Nebraska.
Dragons watch a movie called 'How to train your Chuck Norris.'
Chuck Norris took a nap. The result was the Great Depression.
Chuck Norris puts ice cube trays in the cupboard, and he gets ice.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an attitude. He has a personality you can't handle.
Chuck Norris doesn't shave, his beard grows to the perfect length and stops.
If Chuck Norris movies were in 3D, the audience would be dead.
If Chuck Norris ever got caught for speeding, he'd let the cops off with a warning.