The Dead Sea was formerly known as The Living Sea. Until it met Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can headbutt himself in the face.
Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
Most kids pee their name into snow... Chuck Norris pisses his in concreate...
Chuck Norris knows your reading this...
If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
When Chuck Norris touched a Prius, it turned into a Ferrari
Chuck Norris checks under his bed for Fedor Emelianenko because he takes Fedor to the vet regularly.
If you look back far enough in your family tree, Chuck Norris appears at least three times.
Chuck Norris can actually describe the taste of purified water.
The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.