For every victim of a Chuck Norris round house kick, there is a star. As you can see, there are a lot.
The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
When a zombie apocalypse starts, Chuck Norris doesn't try to survive. The zombies do.
Chuck Norris always has s*x on the bottom. Because he never f*cks up.
When Chuck Norris goes to out to eat, he orders a whole chicken, but he only eats its soul.
Human cloning is outlawed because if Chuck Norris were cloned, then it would be possible for a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick to meet another chuck Norris roundhouse kick. Physicists theorize that this contact would end the universe.
Chuck Norris can make you fold a Royal Flush.
Chuck Norris has only used the 'Total Gym' twice in his life. When his eyes are open - and when they are closed.
Chuck Norris went an hour without killing... just to kill some time.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank. The iceberg was just a cover-up.