When Chuck Norris breaks a sweat... he tries to do it as quickly as possible so as not to hurt it.
Every time Chuck Norris farts a hurricane forms.
You might kill two birds with one stone, but Chuck Norris kills two stones with one bird.
The Beatles' song "HELP" was written after they met Chuck Norris.
A watched pot boils instantly for Chuck Norris.
The original title for Alien vs. Predator was Alien and Predator vs Chuck Norris. The film was cancelled shortly after going into preproduction. No one would pay nine dollars to see a movie fourteen seconds long.
Ballet is banned within a 1000 miles of Chuck Norris.
A body in motion will remain in motion until roundhouse kicked by Chuck Norris.
The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.
Chuck Norris once ate three 72 oz. steaks in one hour. He spent the first 45 minutes having sex with his waitress.