When Chuck Norris burns calories, he uses a flamethrower.
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Chuck Norris doesnt' walk away from explosions, explosions walk away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris beat a brick wall at tennis.
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If, by some incredible space-time parodox, Chuck Norris would ever fight himself, he'd win.
Period.
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The housing market crashed because Chuck thought he was paying too much property tax.
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Water needs safety arm bands when swimming with Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have hair on his testicles, because hair does not grow on steel.
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Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a security system. Chuck Norris is a security system.
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When Chuck Norris was a baby he didnt have teddy bears. He had real bears.
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When Chuck Norris runs backwards during a fight, it may seem like he's retreating.
He's not. He's just attacking from another direction.
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