The Holy Grail is in Chuck Norris's living room.
We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King and got one.
Cavemen didn't invent fire Chuck Norris mearly clicked his fingers and gave it to them.
Chuck Norris can fly around the world on a paper airplane.
If at first you don't succeed, you are not Chuck Norris.
The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
Chuck Norris can suck a black hole.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
Chuck Norris is the only human being to display the Heisenberg uncertainty principle -- you can never know both exactly where and how quickly he will roundhouse-kick you in the face.