Chuck Norris gets a the highest score possible on Wii Fit by sitting down.
Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.
Who would win in a fight between a bear and a lion? Answer - neither, Chuck Norris would beat them both with a single round-house-kick.
Chuck Norris can piss into Gale force winds.
Titanic crashed into Chuck Norris' cut out toe nail.
Chuck Norris' pager is still cool.
Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
Chuck Norris does not open doors. Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
Chuck Norris can make a Java Program in visual studio 2010.
Some people have alter egos. Chuck Norris has no such thing.