Chuck Norris can blow smoke rings, but also smoke squares. Actually he can also blow your face.
Chuck Norris can send you a roundhouse kick by E-Mail.
Chuck Norris graduated college in one hour.
Chuck Norris grinds his coffee with his teeth and boils the water with his own rage.
When somebody else yawns, Chuck Norris does not.
Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
All of Chuck Norris's opinions can be proven with science.
Chuck Norris caught a bullet with the same gun he fired it from.
Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
If Chuck Norris was a spartan the movie would be called "1".
When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.