Chuck Norris can spell roundhouse kick with five letters: death.
Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
Chuck Norris once was pulled over by a policeman for speeding. Chuck gave him a warning.
Chuck Norris won the Kentucky derby, on a Unicorn.
When Chuck Norris plays Monopoly, it changes the actual world economy.
When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.
If Chuck Norris was in a video game it would be called Immortal Kombat.
Chuck Norris can set water on fire. He can also set fire on water.
Chuck Norris was the reason the Titanic sank. The iceberg was just a cover-up.