Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.
Teacher to student "Why is every answer on your test 'Chuck Norris'?" Student to teacher "Chuck Norris is the answer to all problems!"
Before god said, "Let there be light," he asked Chuck Norris,"Can light let there be?"
We only submit these facts so he doesn't kill us.
Remember the Leia scene from The Last Jedi? That wasn't the force, it was Chuck Norris resurrecting Carrie Fischer.
Chuck Norris can run so fast he can cause time travel.
Goku and Superman once had a baby his name is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not eat. Food understands that the only safe haven from Chuck Norris' fists is inside his own body.
Chuck Norris can kiss his own elbow, both at the same time.
Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.