The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
Google won't search for Chuck Norris because it knows you don't find Chuck Norris, he finds you.
When you look for Chuck Norris on Wikipedia, it redirects you to the article titled "Roundhouse kick."
Chuck Norris occasionally smokes large cigars. The last one was called the Hindenburg.
Superman is faster then a speeding bullet. Chuck Norris just runs Superman down and keeps going.
Chuck Norris can press "Pause" on reality.
The phrase 'dead ringer' refers to someone who sits behind Chuck Norris in a movie theater and forgets to turn their cell phone off.
Chuck Norris can answer a missed call.
Chuck Norris once entered a black hole just to see what was in it. Dissapointed, he then walked out.
Chuck Norris once drank wine from a chalice. This chalice is now known as the holy grail.