The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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When Chuck Norris talks, E.F. Hutton listens.
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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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It's a proven fact that you will go blind faster staring at a picture of Chuck Norris than you would staring at the sun.
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Chuck Norris can hit you so hard your blood will bleed.
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Someone once broke into Chuck Norris' house and instead of stealing anything they gave Chuck Norris everything they owned.
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Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
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Chuck Norris's computer has no "backspace" button, Chuck Norris doesn't make mistakes.
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Hurricane Katrina wasn't the weather... it was the wind of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick from Texas to Louisiana.
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Chuck Norris is the only man to punch a cyclops between the eyes.
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