The only time Chuck Norris has ever faced a worthy opponent is when he looked at himself in the mirror.
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Chuck Norris one checked the Library of Congress for typos during his lunch hour.
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Chuck Norris invented his own brand of media disc.
The Black and Blueray.
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Chuck Norris doesn't check under his bed for monsters, monsters check on top of the bed to see if Chuck Norris is sleeping.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need oxygen tanks when scuba diving.
He simply sucks all the life out of the ocean to breath.
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Chuck Norris won the Boston marathon in New York.
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Chuck Norris got a homerun in bowling.
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Chuck Norris keyboard doesn't need a delete button.
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Chuck Norris has hair of steel wool.
That's why his mullet never moves.
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The burning bush that Moses spoke of was actually Chuck Norris's beard!
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Chuck norris once killed a bear with an imaginary knife.
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