A blind man ran into Chuck Norris and got his sight back. Unfortunately, the first and last thing he saw was a roundhouse kick to the face.
Chuck Norris once saw a video that takes 24 hours to watch... He saw it 3 times a day.
2012 is the predicted date for the end of the world. The only rational explanation is Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
Before Chuck Norris can register as a soldier, all wars suddenly end.
When Chuck Norris does a push up, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.
Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row. The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey. He chews bees...
Chuck Norris can walk up a down elavator.