Chuck Norris does not open doors. Tthe doors have the common courtesy to open for him
Chuck Norris doesn’t swim, we beats the water into submission.
Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
Chuck Norris's Birthday is October 32th.
When Chuck Norris plays the game Clue, the answer is always everyone in every room with a roundhouse kick!
Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris. His voice is still up there today.
Salmon swim upstream because Chuck Norris is downstream.
When Chuck Norris jumps from a building, the concrete commits suicide.
Chuck Norris walked into the gold and silver pawn shop in Las Vegas. They made a deal. Chuck now owns the shop.