Chuck Norris shaves with predator mandibles and uses alien blood for shaving cream.
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When Chuck Norris enters a room, he doesn't turn the lights on, he turns the dark off
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When Chuck Norris wants to burn calories, he throws fat kids into a camp fire.
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Why does Chuck Norris have a beard?
A better question is what will he do to you if you ask him?
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Rudolph has a red nose because he got lippy and Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked him across the face several times.
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Chuck Norris can flush a port-a-potty.
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Chuck Norris can skip a sound track on the radio if he doesn't like it.
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Chuck Norris doesn't actually write books.
The words assemble themselves out of fear.
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Chuck Norris can alphabetize m&m's
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Usually when kids go to sleep they sleep with a teddy bear...
Chuck Norris sleeps with an actual bear
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Chuck Norris shot a man to death with an unloaded nerf gun.
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