Joke #11468

You're not alone. Sometimes, even Usain Bolt feels like he's running in circles.
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The ladies say I'm like Usain Bolt in the bedroom... I usually wear a yellow and green vest.
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Two girl sprinters are training for the 100 metres race. One says to the other: "You won't believe this, but I've just run 100 metres in 10 seconds." The other says: "But that's impossible, that's the world record." So the other says: "Ah hah, but I took a short cut."
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Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year. In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
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So I heard the reason Usain Bolt is so fast is because his offseason training consists of going back home and hitting on dudes.
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An elderly patient needs a heart transplant and discusses his options with his doctor. The doctor says, ‘We have three possible donors. One is a young, healthy athlete. The second is a middleaged businessman who never drank or smoked, and the third is an attorney who just died after practising law for 30 years.’ ‘I’ll take the lawyer’s heart,’ says the patient. ‘Why?’ asks the doctor. The patient replies, ‘It’s never been used.’
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Did you hear about the hopeless athlete? He ran a bath and came in second.
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Q: Why was the blonde jogging backwards? A: She wanted to gain weight!
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A javelin thrower called Vicky Found the grip of her javelin sticky. When it came to the throw She couldn't let go. Making judging the distance quite tricky.
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Peter: Why was the Olympian not able to listen to music? Matthew: Why? Peter: Because he broke the record!
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Light was heard saying to his son, "Keep practicing and one day you will be faster than the speed of Usain."
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