How do elves greet each other?
"Small world, isn't it?"
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What do you call an intelligent man in America?
A tourist.
Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with?
A: Why, shortbread of course!
Chuck can use "save" in real life.
But he doesn't need it.
Vote:
My son asked me today, "Dad, what music did you like growing up?"
"Led Zeppelin," I replied.
"Who?" he said.
"Yeah, I liked them too."
Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A: "Wrap" music!
A: Who sings "Blue Christmas" and makes toy guitars?
A: Elfis!
Air traffic controller:
"Flight 1234, for noise abatement turn right 45 degrees."
Airline pilot: "But Center, we are at 35,000 feet. How much noise can we make up here?"
Air Traffic controller: "Sir, have you ever heard the noise a 747 makes when it hits a 737?"
Q: Where do you find elves?
A: Depends where you left them!
Doc, I think I need to wear glasses
Indeed you have to, you are in a bank.
If you messed up your life, you could press "Ctrl, Alt, Delete" and start all over!
To get your daily exercise, just click on "run"!
If you needed a break from life, click on suspend.
Hit "any key" to continue life when ready.
To get even with the neighbors, turn up the sound blaster.
To add/remove someone in your life, click settings and control panel.
To improve your appearance, just adjust the display settings.
If life gets too noisy, turn off the speakers.
When you loose your car keys, click on find.
"Help" with the chores is just a click away.
Auto insurance wouldn't be necessary.
You would use your diskette to recover from a crash.
And, we could click on "SEND NOW" and a Pizza would be on it's way to you.