How do elves greet each other?
"Small world, isn't it?"
Similar jokes
See also best jokes rated by other visitors or new jokes.
Q: What did the elf say was the first step in using a Christmas computer?
A: "First, YULE LOGon"!
Two guys show up in Heaven at the same time.
The first guy says he froze to death, and the second guy tells him that he died of a heart attack.
"How did that happen?" asks the first guy.
"Well, I came home and thought I heard my wife with another man. But when I searched the house, I couldn't find anybody. I was so stricken with remorse for wrongly accusing my wife of infidelity, I had a heart attack and died on the spot."
"Geez," says the first guy. "If you'd opened the fridge, we'd both be alive right now."
Q: Why did the elves spell Christmas N-O-E?
A: Because Santa had said, "No L!"
Q: What kind of music do elves like best?
A: "Wrap" music!
A new man is brought into Prison Cell 102.
Already there is a long-time resident who looks 100 years old.
The new man looks at the old-timer inquiringly.
The old-timer says, "Look at me. I'm old and worn out. You'd never believe that I used to live the life of Riley. I wintered on the Riviera, had a boat, four fine cars, the most beautiful women, and I ate in all the best restaurants of France."
The new man asked, "What happened?"
"One day Riley reported his credit cards missing!"
One elf said to another elf, "We had Grandma for Christmas dinner".
And the other elf said, "Really? We had turkey!"
What is special about a dead baby over all other forms of life?
You can achieve deep throat from whichever way you enter.
Q: Where do you find elves?
A: Depends where you left them!
1st Eskimo: "Where did your mother come from?"
2nd Eskimo: "Alaska."
1st Eskimo: "Don’t bother, I’ll ask her myself!"