I wish my grades would smoke weed too so we could both get higher.
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Q: Why don't you see any pot heads in elementary school?
A: Because they're all in high school
If you say "alright" in the mirror 3 times Matthew McConaughey will appear and hand you a joint.
Q: How did the sand get wet?
A: The sea weed!
Teacher: “How can you prove the earth is round?”
Boy: “I can’t. Besides, I never said it was.”
Teacher: “Suppose there were a dozen sheep and six of them jumped over a fence.
How many would be left?”
Boy: “None.”
Teacher: “None? You don’t know your arithmetic!”
Boy: “Teacher, you don’t know your sheep. When one goes, they all go!”
One day, a young boy was asked by his teacher to tell him what the chemical formula for water was.
The boy replied with "H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O".
The Teacher was stunned. "That's not right, how did you come up with that?"
The boy said, "Last week you said it was H2O!"
I still don't understand why smoking weed makes you a criminal...
When I smoke it the only thing I a threat to is cake.
Mom: What did you do at school today?
Mark: We did a guessing game.
Mom: But I thought you were having a math exam.
Mark: That’s right!
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay:
"What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
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