Chuck Norris fell off a building, he got sued for breaking the sidewalk with his fists.
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Chuck Norris once had a bet with the Hulk, the loser had to paint himself green.
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Chuck Norris throws a dodgeball at you, knocks all your teeth out.
Then the ball hits you.
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Chuck Norris won a marathon on a treadmill.
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Chuck Norris doesen't fly, gravity collapses around him.
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Chuck Norris can divide by zero.
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Chuck Norris' sweat is used to disinfect operating rooms.
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Chuck Norris traveled around the world in 60 milliseconds.
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Chuck Norris acting contracts are if the movie producer want Chuck Norris to act in his movie, the producer is roundhouse kicked.
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In an official mandate, 'Walker, Texas Ranger' DVD discs have been ordered to replace the armor plating in all bulletproof vests.
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Everybody knows that Chuck Norris can't shoot a bow even though he got 5 bullseyes in a row.
The only reason he got the bullseye is that his arrows know better than to miss.
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