Chuck Norris does not listen to lectures.
Lectures listen to Chuck Norris.
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There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
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Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
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Dinosaurs once crossed Chuck Norris.
Once.
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Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
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To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
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Santa delivers to Chuck Norris' house first.
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When Chuck Norris bakes cookies for his enemies, he adds his own secret ingredient to make a special taste to it. Its called "defeat".
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The original CBS Survivor series was filmed in Chuck's mansion.
No episode aired, as no one survived.
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Dragons watch a movie called 'How to train your Chuck Norris.'
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Labradoodles were made when Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a Labrador and a Poodle at the same time.
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