Chuck Norris does not listen to lectures.
Lectures listen to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once hit 3 touchdowns during a friendly game of full-contact bowling.
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You can't win a starring contest with Chuck Norris becuase when you look in to his eyes you see hell starring right back at you.
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Chuck Norris once ran in a movie marathon.... and won.
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It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
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Chuck Norris and Superman once fought each other on a bet.
The loser had to start wearing his underwear on the outside of his pants.
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Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
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Even Google can't find Chuck Norris.
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If Chuck Norris were to get into a fight with another Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris would win.
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Chuck Norris can won the winter Olympics...
In the summer.
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Chuck Norris rejects your reality and substitutes it with his fist.
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