What do you call a fish with no eye? Fsh.
A mother was reading a book about animals to her 3 year old daughter. Mother: "What does the cow say?" Child: "Moo!" Mother: "Great! What does the cat say?" Child: "Meow." Mother: "Oh, you're so smart! What does the frog say?" And this wide-eyed little 3 year-old looked up at her mother and in her deepest voice replied, "Bud."
Why do rabbits go to the beauty parlor? For hare care.
What happens when a cow stops shaving? It grows a Moostache.
What is a bear's favourite drink? Koka-Koala.
What do you call a tired cow? Milked out.
Two blondes were walking through the woods when one looked down and said "Oh, look at the deer tracks." The other blonde looks and says "Those aren't deer tracks, those are wolf tracks." "No. Those are deer tracks." They keep arguing, and arguing, about half hour later they were both killed by a train.
How do you get a hundred cows in a barn? You hang up a bingo sign!
Contrary to popular belief, Chuck Norris, not the box jellyfish of northern Australia, is the most venomous creature on earth. Within 3 minutes of being bitten, a human being experiences the following symptoms: fever, blurred vision, beard rash, tightness of the jeans, and the feeling of being repeatedly kicked through a car windshield.
When do rabbits have buck teeth? When their parents won't get them braces.
What do you get if you cross an eel with a shopper? A slippery customer.