Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
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Chuck Norris's urine was the main ingredient for balco's designer steroids.
Therefore, Chuck Norris is actually the all-time single-season home run king.
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Chuck Norris doesn't check the time - he decides it.
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According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
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Chuck Norris's GPS still can't find him.
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Some say that Chuck Norris is the Stig.
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Solar flares are a myth... it's really Chuck Norris' flashlight.
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Chuck Norris can cross all Seven Bridges of Konigsberg, making all the current laws of Math, obsolete.
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A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
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Q: How many licks does it take Chuck Norris to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop?
A: Zero. He simply stares at the candy and the outer coating is gone.
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Chuck Norris can play Bach's 9th Symphony with a triangle.
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