Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
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Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
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All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
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Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris's tombstone will say, "He's finally taking a nap, do not wake."
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Sharks watch Chuck Norris week.
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Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a chin under his beard just another fist!
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Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.
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Chuck Norris can pick "side" when flipping a coin.
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