Chuck Norris can't finish a "color by numbers" because his markers are filled with the blood of his victims. Unfortunately, all blood is dark red.
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Chuck Norris doesn’t wash his clothes, he disembowels them.
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Jurrasic Park is a second name for Chuck Norris' backyard.
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Alien from "A.V.P" is just Chuck Norris' Gecko.
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The sun is Chuck Norris's pocket flashlight.
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The dinosaurs aren't extinct.
They're just hiding from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris designed and created two series of cars.
These are now known as Autobots and Decepticons.
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If Chuck Norris had to he could give CPR to himself.
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Chuck Norris didn't shoot the sheriff, but he roundhouse kicked the deputy.
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Chuck Norris once slapped a man into next week.
The man was missing for four and a half years.
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When Jeronimo jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "CHUUUUCCCKKK NNNNOOOORRRIIIISSSSSS!"
When Chuck Norris jumps out of an airplane, he yells: "MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!"
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