Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president.
If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong.
And stop being a racist.
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Chuck Norris can tie his shoes with his feet.
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Chuck Norris can make love to a girl so hard and fast it inspired a reality tv series.
We know it as Forged in the fire.
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Chuck Norris Avenged the Avengers.
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When observing a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick in slow motion one finds that Chuck Norris actually rapes his victim in the ass, smokes a cigarette with Dennis Leary, and then roundhouse kicks them in the face.
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Industrial logging isn't the cause of deforestation.
Chuck Norris needs toothpicks.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he saw a fat chick, he roundhouse kicked her so hard she transformed.
She is now known as Britney Spears.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
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Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Chuck Norris was once asked to place his legs and fists in the cargo bay of a plane because weapons aren't allowed in the cabin.
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The Hulk is Green because he envys Chuck Norris.
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