Chuck Norris is widely predicted to be first black president. If you’re thinking to yourself, “But Chuck Norris isn’t black”, then you are dead wrong. And stop being a racist.
If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
Chuck Norris gives Freddy Krueger nightmares.
If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
Voldemort refers to Chuck Norris as "You Know Who."
The light at the end of the tunnel is actually Chuck Norris holding a flashlight.
The smoothie was invented when Chuck Norris needed information from a banana.
Osama Bin Laden is hiding from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't stub his toes. He accidentally destroys chairs, bedframes, and sidewalks.
Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.